Red Carpet: Closing Out the Met Gala

And just like that (after a week and a half of very hard work…) another Met Gala has come and gone. Let’s close this thing out, move on to Cannes (and the Royal Wedding!!!), and actually go see the “Heavenly Bodies” exhibit!

Lena Waithe in Carolina Herrera

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This is a fucking triumph. First of all, the iteration of the LGBT flag used by Waithe and Herrera here is straight out of Philly! To quote The Philadelphia Inquirer: “The rainbow cape that queer black actress Lena Waithe wore Monday to the Met Gala in New York included black and brown stripes, mirroring the pride flag in Philadelphia, which last year became the first city to add black and brown stripes atop its pride flag to represent LGBT people of color”. Second of all, this is such a beautiful and subversive statement. The cape itself is stunning, but it’s also a commentary on the Church’s legacy of discrimination against queer communities. It not only adheres to the theme, but it takes it a step further – making a powerful statement about the Church’s past and future. I would never have thought of Lena and Carolina as potent partners in fashion, but the work they did here together is brilliant and moving.

Issa Rae in Michael Kors

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Beautiful. Michael picked a theme and stuck with it – he dressed Issa, Liu Wen, and Naomi Watts all in variations on the gilded theme, and they all looked lovely.

Salma Hayek in custom Altuzarra

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YAS. SALMA. This is what happens when you escape from the dark style dungeon Gucci has been keeping you in. This is stunning – it’s a depiction of the Garden of Eden, but the sequined material gives it a really unique modern, pixelated look. I absolutely love this.

Evan Rachel Wood in Altuzarra

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Altuzarra killed it this year. This is incredibly stunning – a much more subtle and delicate angel than Katy Perry’s. And I love that she paired her “wings” with pants, sticking with her preference for menswear.

Rooney Mara in Givenchy

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I love this dress and am SO thrilled to see Rooney go with something in a color rather than her traditional black or white, especially on an evening when it would have been easy to do so. I actually had this Givenchy look on my long list of potential Oscars gowns – I had it pegged for Greta Gerwig. Very glad to see it out and about on a red carpet.

Anna Wintour in Chanel

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Anna usually just kinda does her own Anna Wintour thing at the Met Gala, regardless of theme. This Chanel look is both in her wheelhouse and on theme, so I’m on board. There have been some rumors that this may have been Anna’s last Met Gala as head of Vogue, which I hope aren’t true. I kind of always imagined she’d serve Vogue till she died, like a Supreme Court Justice.

Tiffany Haddish in Brandon Maxwell

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I really don’t like this at all. Tiffany is all personality and this has none.

Jenifer Lopez in Balmain

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Slinky, spangled, feathered, and totally unsubtle – classic J. Lo. I’m into this.

Tracee Ellis Ross in Michael Kors

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This would have been so perfect for 2010’s “American Woman: Fashioning a National Identity” gala – she could have gone as Barbie, a truly classic American woman! Tracee is one of the stars I get the most excited to see on a red carpet – she’s always unique and adventurous and it usually pays off. This, I don’t get though.

Miley Cyrus in Stella McCartney

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No thanks. Every time I think Miley has turned a corner, she almost shows us her ass crack again.

Selena Gomez in Coach

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Dear Coach,

Please stop trying to make red carpet gowns. You are really, sincerely, very, very bad at it.



(Seriously though, this is a hideous mess. Her tan is a disaster, her chest has zero support, and her hair makes her look somewhat deranged.)

Letitia Wright in Coach

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I mean, it’s better than Selena’s, but still a hard no from me. Please stick to leather goods, Coach.

Kristin Scott Thomas in Erdem

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Given their general gilded nature, I was surprised that there was only one Erdem design represented at this years Gala. It is a lovely one though.

Keltie Knight in Paolo Sebastian

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OK, so this is hilarious: her earrings are of Anna Wintour’s face, and you can currently bid on them for only $1,525! I can only imagine the conversation they had about those – I hope Anna was delighted. Also, I really like her dress. Also, Also – does someone want to buy me those earrings!?

Katharine McPhee in Georges Chakra Couture

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This had some potential, but the visible underpants ruin it for me. And she may have hit her quotient on gold bracelets.

Amal Clooney in Richard Quinn

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OK, so I really want to like this, and from the back I REALLY do. It’s designed by Richard Quinn, whose debut runway show the Queen famously attended a few months back. I like his work and think he has a long career ahead of him – especially given that he snagged the opportunity to dress a Met Gala chair so soon after his debut. However, either Amal or Quinn chose to pair the skirt with a silver bustier and navy cigarette pants, and I just don’t think these pieces are gelling as well as they had hoped. I would have loved to see this pattern as a whole gown. Good on Amal for going with an up and coming designer though.

Sasha Lane in Tory Burch

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This is less “Heavenly Bodies” and more “Victorian negligee”.

Greta Gerwig in The Row

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Controversial opinion: I love this. I often struggle with figuring out who exactly The Row is for, if not for wealthy witches – but this is a great example of the perfect occasion for one of the Olsen’s creations. It’s extremely priest-like, but in a haute couture kind of way..

Naomi Watts in Michael Kors

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Very pretty, but like the other Kors dresses of the evening, somewhat basic for the occasion.

Laura Dern in Proenza Schouler

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Laura is wearing a rare necklace designed by sculptor Alexander Calder which is really neat, but this dress is so basic and way too casual.

Claire Danes in Marni

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First of all, let’s talk about the gentleman she is posing with, who was simply identified as “Guest” in all the photos from Getty. He is EXTRA. He’s literally wearing a monkey suit, a pussy bow shirt, sneakers and a blue satin bucket hat. It’s a lot of look, it’s confusing, it’s…something. It might be my new life’s mission to figure out who this man of mystery is. Claire looks somewhat less ridiculous than her companion, but still not great. This is not only completely off-theme, but it’s ill-fitting and strange.

Uma Thurman in custom Gabriela Hearst

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Her hair and jewels are lovely and interesting, but the dress is pretty dull.

Scarlett Johansson in Marchesa

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Scarlett is the first celebrity to wear Marchesa, the brand co-owned by Georgina Chapman (Harvey Weinstein’s ex-wife) since Weinstein’s crimes were revealed and the #MeToo movement began. There has been a lot made about this being Marchesa’s big comeback, and I think that’s definitely possible – the Met Gala is certainly the right stage for a major fashion comeback. I strongly believe that a wife should not be punished for her husbands evil deeds – this article about Georgina was very sympathetic and made you feel for her as one of Harvey’s less obvious victims. I would welcome the return of Marchesa to red carpets. This dress is lovely (not on theme at all) but very lovely and romantic in the way that Marchesa’s best work tends to be.

Tessa Thompson in Thom Browne

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Tessa is so cool. Thom Brown is also so cool. And it’s always exciting to see his stuff on the red carpet. This whole look is just really cool.

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen in Paco Rabanne and The Row

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Well…they already kind of look like witches the church would burn at the stake? They didn’t have to work hard to get on theme.

Misha Nonoo in Misha Nonoo

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Misha has been rumored to be the matchmaker who set up Meghan Markle and Prince Harry, so thanks in advance for this weekends festivities! She has her own line, which I am not super familiar with, but I appreciate her commitment to the nun/Elizabethan aesthetic. Looking forward to seeing what she will presumably deign for herself for the wedding on Saturday!

Lena Dunham in Ronald van der Kamp

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Speaking of commitment to Elizabethan attire – this is truly terrifying but also exceptionally well done. She even has the creepy/hideous consumptive makeup down pat. Respect. But also terror.

Zoë Kravitz in Saint Laurent by Anthony Vaccarello

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Oh cool, I didn’t realize the Catholic Church approved of going commando? What a note to end on!



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